whisper

if they’re small

and you look at them from far away

and you’re blind

i need more cats

I hate how belts never have enough holes in them.

my favorite tumblr just deleted

lol can i die pls

i found this method to be really effective.

1. watch e-talk Canada

2. cancer

the reason this works so well is because e-talk is a burbling concoction of stalking celebs on dates and reporting on what they ate for lunch, calling celebs by terrible ‘chummy’ nicknames, and admitting that they literally do not know anything about the latest rumors.

100% sucess

microwave mug cake is really nasty, jussayin. it looks and tastes like a sponge. not fun.

if I could just get a dozen tim horton’s donuts and eat every single one of them in a sitting then life would be perfect right now

I remember there was this one bus driver who, when we got to the last stop, would always turn on his mic and address the passengers as if we were passengers on a plane. He’d do the whole “good morning, this is your driver speaking. it’s currently _:__am and __ degrees, please remember to take all your belongings and enjoy your trip”
what a lovely guy